


A Heart of Light

by the_protector_of_light



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Anxiety, Depression, F/M, Kairi is badass, Self-Hatred, may or may not continue, no update schedule, vent fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-11
Updated: 2019-05-11
Packaged: 2020-03-01 04:05:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18792640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_protector_of_light/pseuds/the_protector_of_light
Summary: Kairi lies in bed one morning unable to get herself moving for the day, too afraid of what might happen. But maybe she should do something, something that everyone discourages her from doing...maybe she should go find her friends. After all, they always found her.





	A Heart of Light

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, as it says in the tags, this is a vent fic. There is no planned update schedule, and I may or may not even continue it. I'd like to, but of course, I have another big project, and several other projects on the backburner. So yeah! Please enjoy!

A Heart of Light

Chapter 1

Kairi couldn’t make herself get out of bed. The sun was shining in through the windows. Birds sang outside the walls. She was too hot under the covers of her bed…but she couldn’t get up.

Sora was gone, Riku was looking for him…she had been left alone once again. If she got up, she could go visit someone—maybe Xion, maybe Lea, maybe Aqua…but the thought of company wasn’t tempting enough to make her move.

This was all her fault. If she had been stronger, Xehanort wouldn’t have grabbed her, he wouldn’t have killed her…Sora wouldn’t have gone looking for her, and she wouldn’t have come home without him. Sora would be here. Riku would be here…they would be together.

But now she lay in bed, curling up into a smaller ball underneath the covers that were hot enough to suffocate her, but unwilling to climb out from underneath them.

Her friends were gone, but still the sun shone. Still life moved on around her. Most days, she could make herself get out of bed to visit friends, to act normal…a little sad was okay, even expected…but when she was like this, when she couldn’t even face leaving her bed…she didn’t want anyone to see her.

What if she did leave her bed? Would she be kidnapped again? Even after training with her Keyblade, she had been weak enough to fall. Even with training, she had been too scared to fight when they all were killed by the demon tide. Even after everything, she had been taken, and she had been killed, like the useless, hopeless, damsel in distress that Sora once said would be in the way. He had been right.

She only was brought to fight because they needed numbers, not because she was useful, not because she could be trusted. If she hadn’t been there, if she’d been here, safe at home, would Xehanort have gotten so far? In the end, he had failed, but not without the consequence of her life, and later, not without the consequence of Sora’s.

She was never kidnapped when she did leave. She knew this fear was unwarranted. She wasn’t kidnapped, she wasn’t killed…she wasn’t lost in space or the darkness…her friends didn’t hate her for Sora being gone…but she felt like if she got out of bed, everything would have changed, and all those things would be true.

She didn’t even feel sad on these days. She didn’t even feel sorry for herself. She just was scared. What if Sora never came home? What if Riku never found him? What then? Would she be alone forever, without her best friends…Without Sora, who she had symbolically tied her life to? It would be her fault.

Sighing, she felt her stomach growl. She could ignore the hunger a little while longer, but should she?

Or should she get up and do something for once, something other than sit around waiting like everyone wanted her to? Should she do something useful for once?

Should she go look for them? Should she just…should she just go?


End file.
